Tuesday, June 5, 2012


Good Morning, Mighty Woman of God!

I thank God always for you and the growth of "Spiritual Growth for Women Ministry".  I pray that you are blessed by the Lord's message on today.

When my husband passed away, I was not surprised.  Six months before he passed away, God told me that I had six months left with him.  I was in my car driving from work and I pretended not to hear correctly.  I told God, "I don't receive that, talk to the hand".  I'm serious, that is exactly what I said at the time.  After that time, God gave me a number of signs.  I never told anyone, I did hear Him correctly and so I prayed.

One day, while cooking dinner, my husband had a heart attack and passed away on the living room sofa.  I dialed 911 right away and began to pray while holding him.  Once the ambulance got to my house I kept praying.  I got in the ambulance and kept praying.  He was on respiratory and the machine was breathing for him, I kept praying.  I had the machines removed and he was pronounced died within 24 hours.  I cried all the way home.  I kept calm throughout making the funeral arrangements and the service.  Later that day, I received a call from a friend and she said, "I wish I could be as calm as you were".  I didn't know what to say, but I understood. I understood because God prepared me six month in advance. I don't know why, I didn't like it; but I understood.

About a year had gone by and I found out that my daughter was mad at God because of her stepfather's passing.  I understood.  Believe it or not, God understood.  You see, God is a big boy, He can take it.  I know that people often get mad at God.  Due to unanswered prayers, passing away of most loved family member and feelings of defeat.  I have even heard people say, "I'm not speaking to God right now."  I understand.

Woman of God, if you are in a position where you are mad at God, or not speaking to Him right now, I understand.  God knows and He understands.  I did not get upset with my daughter, I prayed for her relationship with God.  I knew that just because she was mad at God, that she still loved Him. I also knew that God didn't love her any less.  God understood.  I told my daughter to go to God and tell Him all about it, tell Him why you are mad, God's a big boy, He can take it. 

If you and God are not on speaking terms right now, He's knows why, He understands.  You see, you can not be mad at someone that you don't have a relationship with.  That's a start.  It's truly okay to be mad about a situation that you don't understand why God didn't intervene.  The important thing is that you don't stay mad.  That you don't give up on God completely.  God knows your heart.  God knows you love Him and God still loves you, He understands.  If you are not speaking to God, try to renew your relationship with Him so that you will be restored in your spirit.
Right now, as I am typing, God is working on me.  The truth is that I did not get mad at God, because I was mad at myself.  I need to type what I am feeling because I promised you that I would always be open to you, to help you.  I think that I killed my husband.  I often hear about people praying for healing miracles and they received it.  I think that I should have kept praying longer.  God is speaking to me now and say, "I have the power of life and death, not you."  I guess I didn't know that I still have healing to do in this area of my life.  Until I began this message, I am finding out that God wants to help me. I could not finish this message right away because I am in worship and I can't stop crying.  I thought that I was passed this, I guess I need to understand.  Woman of God, pray for me.  LET US PRAY!

Heavenly Father, I thank you for the message on today.  Lord, I pray that you help us to understand Your will for our lives.  Lord, I pray for the women that may be upset over their circumstances, that they will be renewed unto You. Lord, we know that You are a loving God, and You will always, do what is best for us.  Lord, I speak peace over the women today, in Jesus name, Amen.

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